Big Sister Speech for my Brother's Wedding - 18.02.16

This week I was honoured and excited to be a Bridesmaid at a very special wedding between my Brother Kieran and the beautiful and loving Jane. I also got a request to say something during the speeches, and as I haven't shared anything in a long time I wanted to share what I wrote on the blog.

My baby brother and Jane asked me to say something on their special day as apparently I'm good at public speaking, however my usual crowd is 12-14 year old Girl Guides, so I'll see how well I do here. The last time I spoke in front of family and friends was at a less joyous occasion when my Nan passed away, and as soon as I spoke Kieran was sobbing, so I'm hoping today's speech won't do the same. 

I saw something recently on Facebook titled “You'll only understand if you have a sibling!” Listing all the subtle ways that brothers and sisters get each other into trouble, the fights, the imaginary games, the tricks and hiding things from parents and about being a team, and it got me thinking about being a Big Sister.

From a very young age I turned on “Big Sister Mode”, I looked out for and looked after my baby brother as my main responsibility.

 

 

 

As most of Kieran's friends are aware, after a beer or two in a bar, club and especially at a festival Kieran likes to wander off. He has always done this, not only when drunk! In many situations in our childhood Kieran would be out of earshot and eyesight within minutes, leaving me mortified and often in tears that we had lost him forever and someone would take him away, usually he was lost in Woolworths or the park and could be found in the toy section or playing with some new friends, not in any real danger, but I took my role as big sister seriously and would track him down, bring him back and try to keep him and us out of trouble.

 

As we have now grown up into “mature and responsible!” adults, I have realised two things:-

1.   I might have had a quieter life had I not have been so vigilant, and let him run off and get lost all those years ago.! (joke)

2.   There is now someone else who loves him enough to keep him from wandering off, getting lost and into trouble, and for that I thank you Jane. Thank you for taking on that responsibility and for giving me and everyone else peace of mind in the knowledge that you will look after him.

I know you love each other lots and you will wander together on your own adventures and keep each other safe. I'm excited to have myself a new Big Sister to share the sibling love with, as well as a pain in the bum baby brother!

Why I love Guiding reason 426

It's no secret that I'm a Girl Guide. Most of my blog is about Guiding, in one way or another all the cool and exciting things I do has been a direct result of being a Guide.

Having recently moved to the beautiful county of Shropshire I wanted to get involved in Guiding straight away and got in touch with some local leaders. It took me a little longer than anticipated to settle in and get back in the swing of things but I have recently started with a new unit and things are going well.

It's a lot different here, for a start the group I'm with are all very young which is nice as I will get to see them grow up and get to know them all better over time. They are also country guides. The village they live in is only 4 miles outside of town but it is a world away from the Town Centre I live in and it has been lovely getting to know where they live, I went on a lovely local country walk with them all one evening, they all marched off knowingly, running through the corn fields hiding in each others gardens and stopping by to say hello to someone's mum, dad, cat and dog. The village is on a hill and the views around the surrounding area were pretty stunning. I had to stop and admire the scenery along the way.

Pretty impressive countryside to be living in! Got to love Shropshire for that.

I have also had the opportunity to do a bit of camping with these guides already too. We only had one night away and it was more of a shelter building experience, but it was great to be out in the woods, watching the girls get stuck into some team work making their own shelters, figuring out how to make them waterproof and warm with a bit of help and guidance. A cookout, marshmallows on the fire with plenty of singing, listening to the rain bounce off your tent as you fall asleep snuggled in a sleeping bag on the ground. You can't beat the sound of a campfire, sausages sizzling away and woodsmoke in you hair and clothes, wellies on, ready for action. It was a great little overnight camp.

Pegging out the shelter - fingers crossed its waterproof.

I love all these things I get to do and share with the guides. But the thing I love most of all is this...

Badges!!!

Guides have always earned badges and it has always been one of the things that delighted me as a young guide. However it's is even more satisfying to earn them now.

I have a blanket that I sew them all onto. It's not yet as impressive as some I have seen but it is my prize possession and has over 120 badges on it now from all over the world, some I have earned, others swapped, bought or passed down from family.

Since moving to Shropshire I have been given a couple of badges which have meant a lot. One being the name tag above and the other was a Shropshire standard (local county flag). I think these meant the most because the Standard made me feel like even though I'm from somewhere else, as a Guide I am always included, welcomed and have friends that are like family where ever I go, and Shropshire Guiding has adopted me straight away and I love that feeling of inclusion, fitting in with others who love something as much as I do and getting to share that feeling where ever I go.

The Peer Education Coordinator badge is a little more significant. I had learned about and loved the 'Free Being Me' Peer Education programme at Sangam, and one of my goals for when I came home was to do more with this initiative within my local Guiding community. As soon as I joined Shropshire I was asked if I would take on this role and I felt that my experience and enthusiasm for Free Being Me was truly seen and appreciated,  and now I get to share this passion with Guides all over and help shape and encourage other girls and young women a long the way.

Guiding is awesome. And on that note there is only one thing more to say.....

Practicing Gratitude

I want to write a blog post but I'm not really sure what I want to say, so I'm going to start with this.

I am pretty tired this evening, work is quite mentally demanding and is still new to me after only working there a month so I am still learning a lot every day and making sure I do things the right way, as well as making friends and talking to new people and getting to grips with understanding the business, company and role I have been given, but even with all this I am enjoying it. The role is challenging and something I think I am good at and can see my confidence and skills improving already, which makes work a good place to be and as the saying goes 'time flies when you're having fun'!

As part of my job I work with people who need therapy for a variety of things, depression, stress, illness, bereavement and many more complex mental health issues that I do not have the qualifications or experience to fully understand, but I do know that I have been lucky enough not to experience any of these sometimes severely life limiting things.

I don't have anything I really have to do right now. No outstanding responsibility, no chores, no demands on my time. I can relax, get rested and enjoy the time as my own.
I had a nap earlier this evening after spending some quality time lazing with the boyfriend, the one person I love more than anything and get to see every day which in itself makes me incredibly happy. We talked about fun things we wanted to do, enjoyed a home cooked dinner in our lovely flat after both spending our days at work earning a pretty healthy living.
I'm writing this on a new laptop we decided we wanted and could afford because the old one was too slow. I'm sitting in our living room with comfortable furniture, which is clean, warm and completely paid for. I have things that are my own all around me. Some I have been given, for Christmas, birthdays or by family when we moved here, other stuff I have chosen and bought myself because I can and wanted to. I am not really a person who wants material things, the things I own are on the most part practical and functional, with small exceptions for hobbies and the like. I would much rather spend my money and time on experiences that I can plan, look forward to, share, remember and enjoy.

I am very lucky. When I look at my life in such simple terms I feel eternally grateful for the life I have been given, for the life I am allowed to live, for the opportunities that I have had the fortune to receive and benefit from. I can acknowledge too but that I have the independence and strength to make my own choices. I have been the been the sole decision maker in charge of my life, some decisions weren't always easy or obvious but I always had the power to choose. I know this is a privilege. This is not a right everyone is able to have. I am lucky and I do not take it for granted. I am grateful for the things that I could not choose like where I was born, who my parents are, how I was raised, educated, and for my health and physical ability to do every day things as well as learn and develop other skills because I have the time, money and desire to do so.

As I have gotten older I have become more mindful of appreciating the small things in life and practicing gratitude. I just wanted to share my thoughts on this today as I sit quietly in a place that a year ago I never even dreamed I would be.

Thank you universe for providing. An ever grateful Maxine :)

You are my Sunshine when skies are grey...

**Spoiler Alert*** Look away now if you are someone who gets totes emosh (Becky!!), dislike extreme levels of gushiness and vom at too much romance and lovey doveyness, as this post is gonna have a lot of this.

 I'm celebrating something uber mega special this week. I'm making it a week long celebration because this time last year from the 13th to the 18th of May was a super exciting and ultimately life changing week.

I met this boy.....

See I told you it was going to get soppy! But I will try not to make too many of you vomit.

Mike I and have known each other since I was 16 and he was 20, in a non creepy MTV Catfish kind of way we were AOL Buddies back in the day when online chat rooms were safe (safer) for teens and you didn't get hit on by sex pests. We then had an intermittent friendship, purely online for many years via Twitter, Facebook chat and texts and then last year we decided it was time to meet in real life because we always got on so well and already "liked" each other. I thought being on Catfish would be a great way to meet but as Mike rolled his eyes at this, we decided to meet in Birmingham, and the rest is history. Since then we have been through a lot, 4 months separation while I volunteered abroad, a visit in India and an incredible 2 week holiday travelling and getting to know each other then coming home and lots of driving between Shropshire and Staffordshire before we finally found a perfect place to live and I get to see this face everyday, and it's a whole year later and I don't think I could be happier!

This boy is definitely my sunshine when the days seem grey, he makes every day special in so many ways and makes me understand what Love is.

Love is making your girlfriend a cup of tea every morning before she even wakes up.

Love is casually travelling anywhere between 30-4,000 miles to see the one you love.

Love is bringing Krispy Kreme donuts to cheer a person up after a long day at work,

Love is making the other half of you laugh at so many silly things, so that their face and stomachs hurt from smiling, and you can't breathe properly and doing this at least five times a day.

Love is looking goofy in Selfies when the other person feels self conscious in photographs...

Love is patience to wait for someone you know is worth waiting for.

Love is sharing everything about yourself, and trusting another to accept you just the way you are.

Love is not caring what you look like in the morning, or when you are unwell and seeing the true beauty in another.

Love is sharing special moments, planning adventures far into the future, and enjoying each day making them all into treasured memories.

Love is taking the risk to meet with someone you have had dreams about since you were a teenager and having them all come true.

Day 5 - End of an Era at 1st Basford Guides

One of the best opportunities I have had in my life is being a part of Girl Guiding.

My mum signed me up to be a Rainbow, I was a very shy child and going to Rainbows was a big deal. I  loved putting on my blue tabbard and earning badges,taking part in all sorts of games, songs and activities.  Moving up to brownies at 7, somewhere there is a photo hidden in the depths of my parents photo albums, where I proudly pose in my new yellow and brown uniform tshirt, coulottes and cap, which was at least 2 sizes too big, but I was so pleased to be a brownie and had so many opportunities to grow and learn during this time, then moving up to Guides going on residential camps, abseiling, canoeing, fundraising and doing good deeds in the community, being responsible for those younger than you as a Patrol Leader and planning activities and sessions with the leaders. Unfortunately I didn't stay in Guides all through my teen years, other after school activities and just hanging out with friends over ruled my weekly Wednesday meetings but as an adult fresh out of university, and back from a summer as a Camp Counsellor in North Carolina, I had rekindled my love of camping, outdoors, badges and Guiding.

Back at home I got in touch with the very same Guide unit I was a guide at almost 10 years prior. Run by the same leader, at the same time and at the same local church hall. I went every week for the next 7 or so years. Planned many activities for the Guides, crafts were my forte and I loved sharing the games I had learned from camp and from my other travels. Taking them camping in rain or shine (mostly rain!), bouncing on the coach to the Big Gig, screaming over Ed Sheeran and The Wanted, and singing along to Scouting for Girls! Giving them advice and ideas and inspiration and encouragement on anything they needed.

Over time you get to see these young girls move from Primary to Secondary school, watch as their likes and dislikes change, maturing and shaping themselves into young women, you get to see them discover themselves and experiment with who they want to be, and have the privilege of seeing them grow before your very eyes into intelligent, caring, talented and determined young women.
A few weeks ago I was running my last evening at 1st Basford Guides, it was a tough decision but due to moving house and moving county it had become difficult to go back and forth every week travelling an hour each way, so I took the big decision to say goodbye.

I had been running Free Being Me sessions with my group for a few weeks and was sharing with them about Body Confidence and Self Esteem, the girls had some wonderfully encouraging and insightful things to say and made me immensely proud to be their leader.
Some of the girls I started out with are leaders themselves now, college and university students, or in full time work, others taking their GCSE's and making important steps in what they want to do with their lives. It has been the most humbling experience to be part of their Guiding journey, to see their confidence grow, and to have been allowed to help shape them into something that they too can be proud of, looking back in years to come on fond memories of their childhood and teenage years knowing there were people in their lives who wanted them to do their best and to be proud of who they are.

Thank you Georgina, Charlotte, Ellie, Charlotte, Georgia, Emilia, Elise, Victoria, Izzy, Charlotte, Alice, Ella, Laura, Gaynor and Pauline and so many others who have come and gone over the years, you have all made a huge lasting impression on me and inspire me to keep Leading and Guiding and trying to make that small difference each week to other people's lives.

It really is the end of an era and I felt so emotional leaving on that last night. You have brightened up so many Wednesday nights, always putting a smile on my face and highlighting why Guiding is not just a hobby but a passion in my life.

Day 4 - Electric Date

Mike and I took a trip out on the sunny bank holiday Monday.

Mike likes to plan special things for us to do together, and I got to open another Christmas envelope on May 1st, which is always super exciting to see what he has planned. This month we had a Movie out and dinner. Sounds like a pretty regular date but it had a twist.

This time last year we met for the first time and had an amazing day in Birmingham. It's a very special memory for the both of us.
One of the fun things we did that day was watch a movie at the rather cool and quirky Electric Cinema just on the edge of the City Centre.
As a surprise (which I might have guessed with my awesome detective skills) we rocked up for a matinee showing of Far from the Madding Crowd in the same seats we sat in a year ago. (I know, very romantic!)
What's really great about this cinema is it's a really individual movie experience. They have an old school ticket booth with a window and tear off tickets that say "admit one", a concessions stall, with sweets, cakes, nibbles and booze if you are so inclined.
There are a couple of screens each with 50 or so seats, sofas for two in the back and comfy leather seats with big arms and foot rests at the front. Once you sit down you feel like you are at home in front of a big tv with loads of snacks and drinks, it also helps when the film is excellent and the person you're with is your favourite too.
For dinner we went back to the Miller & Carter restaurant, where last year we spent a long time chatting and had some real deep and meaningful conversations, right up until I had to catch the last train home at 10pm. On this date we had no time limits, had a wonderful meal, shared desserts and got to people watch and guess how many other couples were on first dates. A game I am very good at! Coming back to Birms with Mike was such a wonderful way to walk down memory lane and celebrate an awesome and life changing year together.

Day 3 - Luigi

I have an awesome, gorgeous, wonderful, talented, cheeky and ever surprising Godson.
He is 19 months old and the son of my oldest and best friend. I love him to bits.

Saturday night was my first time babysitting him on my own. EEEEEeeeek I was a bit scared.

I have to say I'm not a natural baby person. I have got better with some practice with other little people but just me and Luigi on our own? so many things could go wrong!
He has an adventurous streak and likes to climb on things that are high and have sharp edges or near glass and electronics. His main aim is to climb onto the arms of the sofa in order to launch himself off and land on the cushions and bounce up and down. He also likes to be picked up and dropped on the sofa by me many many many times over and over. Great game, good for the bingo wings!
He opens doors and is constantly attracted to buttons and switches, every plug socket and device in the house needs to be found and pushed or flicked on and off. He also adores stairs mostly running away and climbing up them. It sounds like a nightmare but we had so much fun and I really enjoyed spending so much one on one time with him.
He was absolutely fine when his mum and dad left for work for the evening. The tiniest bit of shyness crept in when he realised it was just me and him but once I started a game and got him giggling he was more than happy to jump around on the sofa, sit and pop balloons, read stories and sing songs as I attempted to get him to eat food, wipe his nose, put on his pjs and get him to bed.

I feel so grateful I get to spend time with this little person and to see him enjoy spending time with me too. Knowing he recognises me and feels safe and comfortable around me is such a special feeling.

He has such a personality. I can see traits from both his parents shining through but also unique things that are purely his own ways of doing things. I am so excited to see him grow up, I can't wait to be able to have conversations with him. Know what he is thinking. Hear the questions he will ask. Share days out and take him to see new things and teach him stuff too. But for right now I am more than happy to be able to pick him up, have big toddler cuddles and sloppy Luigi kisses.